Fall For You

I was watching MTV Amplified and then this song came out.So,I went and download this song.(Kids,please do NOT try this at home because it is piracy.Please go and buy their CD.Support the music industry by paying and making the singers/bands richer)

Fall For You
by Secondhand Serenade

The best thing about tonight's
that we're not fighting
It couldn't be that we have been this way before
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core



But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night
that I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind



I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find



This is not what I intended
I always swore to you that
I would never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may have failed
But I have loved you from the start



Oh, But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night
that I will fall for you, over again
Don't make me change my mind
I won't live to see another day

I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
It's impossible



So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in
I'm yours to keep



And hold onto your words
'Cause talk is cheap
And remember me tonight
When you're asleep



Because tonight will be the night
that I will fall for you, over again
Don't make me change my mind
I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find



Tonight will be the night
that I will fall for you, over again
Don't make me change my mind
I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find


It's a song by a band that goes by the name Secondhand Serenade.Secondhand Serenade?What kinda name is that?I wonder where they got that name anyways?From a box of Legos?Anyways,I kinda like the lyrics to that song.Especially the part where it says "Because a girl like you is impossible to find.You're impossible to find"

I know I'm heaping too much praise for Amy but when I listen to that song,my head would start to think about her.I start to think that I'm blessed to have met and fallen for her eventhough the circumstances that we got together was kinda funny.I'm thankful it turned out this way.And I'm not ever going to change my mind about Amy no matter how different we are.People say that we aren't right for each other but what do I care about what people think or say.Fuck what people say.It's my life and I choose to be with her no matter how many times we fight or argue about who's the man in the relationship or how much of an idiot I can be.Still,it's normal for couples to fight,right?Or issit just me to think that way?If it's just me,then I guess I feel like an noobie.

The more people doubt about this relationship,the more I wanna prove them wrong.I may be an idiot to think naively or being an idealist but I believe that Amy's the one for me and there's nothing in this damn world that can change my mind.Well,except of course for the Olsen twins.Again with the Olsen twins!!!!

Currently listening to "Fall For You" by Secondhand Serenade.

And the reason is you

Next month would be a new chapter in my life.I'm gonna be working.I'm gonna be part of the working class now and it's pretty exciting.I can't wait for it.

It's funny.A month ago,I was thinking about finding a job here in Penang and leave myself to rot here by myself.I thought I'd just work myself to death and maybe if I get lonely,I'll put my picture up in those Malay magazines where people can hookup.However,something unexpected happened.I fell in love with this pretty amazing girl who I've never had the testicular fortitude to go talk to her during my time at MMU.She has really changed me which I thought was for the better.Who the in blue hell am I talking about?I'm talking about one the Olsen twins.Mary-Kate Olsen!Ok OK .I'm just joking.I'm talking about Amy.I'm in love with a really smart lady who really knows her stuff,except for mebbe playing video games which I think I can totally beat her with my hand tied behind my back.

It's because of her that I thought about trying to find a job which is near her.The thought of me being away from her is just....unthinkable.Besides,long distance relationship never works.That's what she said.So,I made an effort to find a job which is near her and thank God,I got one.Being away from her is just hell for me.I miss her very much.Like right now,I can't help but think about her.I think about the guys that are hitting on her.And it just pisses me off and disappointed that I can't be there to smash those puny guys who are hitting on her.

Then again,when I think about it.Who am I compared to those guys?They're good looking,smart and already working.Me?I'm lacking in the looks department plus I'm just starting to work.It kinda makes me feel inferior.It made me think,why'd she pick me instead of them who are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay better than them.I'm thankful and consider myself lucky for her to pick me instead of those losers.She really does know how to make a guy feel loved.I know I'm not the most sensitive guy and I can be darn slow in picking up signals,but I keep on telling myself that I'm gonna try my best to make her happy.

If anybody asks me why I'm madly in love with her,I can't provide an answer to that question because I can't describe this feeling that I feel for her.All I know is that I'm crazy in love with a smart and pretty girl which is for me,impossible to find.Somehow that song "I Miss You" by Blink 182 is playing around in my head.It's just that when I'm just hanging out by myself I think of her and just wish that I can be right there with her right now.I love you,B.(When I say B,I'm not referring to Blaire Waldorff.For Gossip Girl fans,you know what I mean.)

Anyways,I think I'd better stop writing all these mushy stuff.It's just not like me to write mushy stuff.I have a reputation to keep.hahaha.

Currently listening to "Mr Brightside" by The Killers.

Goosebumps

Geez.I'm getting goosebumps now.Ever since I got that job offer,I've been having goosebumps.Here I am,safe in my comfort zone and now I'm moving out of my comfort zone.Then again,when did I have a comfort zone?Ah..to hell with this.Being nervous about new change are for people who don't have the testicular fortitude to embrace change.I was reading this "Secret Invasion" comic and there was this thing which kinda hit me:Embrace change!

I guess a good change of scenery would be good.There's a chance for me to be a bigger boy and see how ugly the world really is.There's also a chance for me to be closer to my girl.I'd hate to imagine what it'd be like if I was working in Penang.We'd be far apart from each other.I can't be there for her during her darkest hour.I can't be there to comfort her if she needs a shoulder to cry on.I'm not going to let some other guy lend a shoulder for her to cry on.Nope.No Sireeee.No chance in hell.The same thing goes for her.Who's shoulder would I cry on?Definitely not on some guy's shoulder.That's for sure.How gay is that?Ok so maybe I'm thinking negatively.Maybe that guy's just thinking there's no harm in some male platonic relationship.The point is,you can't whine and bitch about how unfair life at the office is to some guy.It sounds so.....gay.

Luckily for me,I scored on the first interview.Impressive eh?First interview,first job.I didn't expect it myself.I thought I crapped a lot during the interview.Here was one of those questions which they asked me:

Dude interviewing:This would be a stressful job.We want to know how would you deal with the stress?
Me:That's an interesting question.Well,most people would resort to smoking or screaming their hearts out.For me,I tend to make a joke out of it.You know,laugh it off.Every morning,I'd wake up and look myself in the mirror and tell myself,"Why so serious?Let's put a smile on that face".Sorry if I'm quoting The Joker here.The point is:I'd try to make jokes out of it to let out all that stress.Then again,listening to good music would be good.
Dude interviewing:There won't be any music here.There's going to be people screaming at you.
Me:Really?Wow.Then I guess I'll just have to assume that as music to my ears.
Dude interviewing:Hahaha

Another question:
Dude interviewing:This is a contract based job.What would you do to earn yourself a spot as a permanent staff here?
Me:I'd try to work hard to earn it then.If let's say I don't get an extension or anything,then so be it.I'll move on and look for another job.You guys watch football?
Dude interviewing:Ah..you're talking about Ronaldo?
Me:Yeah.Something like that but I'm only interested in Arsenal.
Dude interviewing:Oh,you're an Arsenal fan?Bad choice.We're both MU fans (There were 2 guys interviewing me)
Me:Erk.Ohkaaay.What I'm trying to say is that when a footballer reaches the end of his contract and the club does not want to renew his contract then it's best for him to move on and ply his trade at another club.I picture myself as being in that situation.I don't get an extension,then I move on.Just move on and play for another club.
Dude interviewing:Good point.I like that.

For your information:I did not make this shit up.I swear to God that you cannot make this shit up.I thank my Big Brother and my loving girlfriend,Amy for giving me ideas for this interview.I wouldn't have come up with some good answers if it weren't for them.However,that thing about football players,that was all me.My own ideas.hehehe.Thank you.I appreciate your help.

Anyways,here's to a new chapter in life.Cheers.

Currently listening to "The Scientist" by Coldplay.

Wrestlemania moment

First and foremost,I would like to congratulate myself for getting through MMU and getting up onto the stage for my Wrestlemania moment.Then,I'd like to congratulate my girl for getting up there too.And then congratulations to all of my friends for your success.

It's been over a week already that I've had my convocation.I'm supposed to have written about it but I guess writing something about my love life seemed more important to me.So,for this entry,I'm gonna write about my Wrestlemania/Graduation moment.Don't ask me why I call it my Wrestlemania moment.It goes to show that I'm a wrestling freak and I love to watch men in tights with well toned bodies fight among themselves.Yum Yum.(ignore the yum yum part)

Everybody dreams of having a special day in their life.I had my special day.Coincidentally,that day fell on my birthday.It kinda made my day special.Plus I got to spend some time with my girl who has been tremendous to me.I've never felt so happy since.....they made a movie out of my favorite comic book.

I've never sweated as much as I did that day.Shit.It was hot.Luckily I wasn't as hairy as a gorilla but hell,it was definitely hot out there.(I'd like to make a point here.I did not wet my pants because of some....u know what I'm talking about.)It took quite some time just to get up on that stage and get my scroll.It was boring and I was already getting sleepy.I didn't get to say thank you to those people who wished me happy birthday because I was kinda busy with stuff which needed my immediate attention.So,to those people who I kinda ignored during the convocation day,I'd like to apologize.I didn't mean to be a dick by ignoring you guys but there was just something else that was more important.

The saddest part about the whole thing was my phone ran out of battery.Damn!And I didn't take the frigging camera along with me too.So,now I have to go around and beg to people who have pictures.Here's a message to people have pictures with me in it,please tell me.I beg of you.Don't sell it off to Mangga.I don't want to put my face in those cheap tabloid magazines.I'd rather put it on the cover of Playboy.haha.

Anyways,a grand day ended with a not so grand party.The food was not good.AT ALL.Where in the blue did they come up with that shit?God,MMU sure knows how to spoil a good day.At least all's well that ends well.My only regret was not being able to take more pictures with my friends that day.I had to go home early.My underwear was getting wet and i was not feeling comfortable with it.Ok.That part about my underwear was a joke ok?Don't take it too seriously,people.

Cheers,everybody.If I could turn back time to that day,I would.

Currently listening to "Everything Burns" by Ben Moody featuring Anastacia.

Twist of fate

Remember my last post where I would tell people what the significance of 1st August 2008?Well,the significance is that I finally found the girl that would really make feel happy,loved and appreciated.
I know it sounds corny but the way it happened was really strange.Even for you readers out there would be asking:How in the blue hell did they end up with each other?Or people would be saying "What the fuck?".I ask the same thing too.How it came to be like this was really strange.It's as if it was a scene from the movie The Lake House.Check out IMDB.com if you wanna know more about the movie.The movie is available at video stores near you.
Here's the thing about this.Me and Amy.We've been in the same class for like four years.We see each other almost everyday BUT we've never said hi or say howdy or say wassup,nigga?Never.We started talking when she added me through YM to discuss about accounting theory.That was it.I only talked to her online but never offline.I dunno.Maybe I was shy or maybe I was just not confident enough to go up to a girl like her and say "hey,how are ya?Feeling good today?" or "hey,would you like to hang out with an average Joe like me?"I never had the testicular fortitude to go up to her.
However,things changed.We started chatting almost everyday.Well,she would initiate the conversation first and I'd be the one coming up with the interesting but lame topics.My view of her totally changed.I thought she was like of those untouchable girls where you just can't approach to say "hi" or "howdy?".She's actually rather friendly once you get to know her.So,one day,I asked for her number.The reason for that was it would be easier for me to contact her if I were gonna get married or something.I wasn't into her at all.AT ALL!I was chasing another girl which turned out to be a disaster for me.
After that failed mission,my heart was broken into bits and pieces.I was devastated knowing that I could never get a chance to tell that girl how I felt about her.Somehow,I just text Amy on the phone to tell her how it went.Prior to that incident,I had told Amy about what I'm gonna do that day and she was very supportive.However,I didn't realize that from that moment,I'd be hooked onto her.Never at all.It just kinda hit me.I thought:"Maybe I should tell her what happened.Maybe she can make me feel better."To Wanie:I messaged you too.
From that day,we kinda started to text message each other alot.Then,I remembered there was this one time when Amy told me that she was kinda tired and really wanted somebody to talk to.So,I just gave her a call and we kinda talked on a lotta things that night.However,things ended abruptly because my credit ran out.Just when the conversation was getting interesting,my credit ran out.How embarrassing was that?I was cussing my luck when that happened.
She responded in kind to the situation.She'd call me and I'd call her back.We kinda had a lot in common.Soon,I found myself slowly falling for her.Slowly,my pain was subsiding.I just didn't realize that this one night would be a memorable one. I can't remember much about the details but I still remember these words which started everything:

Amy:You know,if I was interested in a guy,I'd be texting and calling him all the time.I'd still find some time to talk to him no matter how busy I am. (I think that last sentence was made up.)
Azrai:Wait a second!Did you say if you're interested in a guy,you'd do all that?Does that mean you're interested in me?
Amy:No shit,Sherlock?Isn't it obvious that I've been doing all that to show you that I'm interested in you?
Azrai:Well,I didn't notice.I am kinda slow in trying to pickup things.
Amy:Now you know.
Azrai:Even if you didn't tell me that,I would have told you I felt the same way too.
Amy:You're shitting me!(Again,a made up statement just to make this look interesting)
Azrai:Really.To tell you the truth,since these last few days,I kinda felt like that I'm slowly falling for you.I just couldn't help it.I was just not confident that a girl like you would be interested in a guy like me.Just look at you.You're like from Earth and me?A martian.
Amy:Hahahaha

And the rest is history.We didn't meet up to tell each other that we're a couple.C'est bizzare,neh?I dunno.She's just so nice to me on the phone and her voice was just........breathtaking.Seriously,if I continue talking like a mad lovestruck hippie,I'm gonna kick myself in the head.I don't do romantic crap but somehow,she managed to bring it out of me.Slowly.Bit by bit.
Some people might be wondering "Why her?" and why not someone else?She is a much more socialable person than I am.She deserves somebody who's good looking as well as from her world and not me,who by the way does NOT look like Shia Lebeaf and living in another kinda dimension.We lead different lives.Her world looks more interesting than mines.So,why'd I pick her?Simple.She's been so caring,loving and good to me.She knows how to make a guy feel appreciated and that made me slowly fall for her.I just thought "fuck what people are gonna say.I'm gonna do the unthinkable."Fall in love with her and look where it's got me.I feel more confident and happier.
How long would this relationship last?I dunno.What I know is that I am gonna maintain it as best as I can.I won't say that I'll try because trying is just gonna cover up the fact that you're not confident enough.There are sometimes doubts about whether am I able to make her happy or whether I can make things work out.The only way to clear those doubts is by taking things slowly.One step at a time.One small step for Azrai.One big leap to a better future.Maybe one day when I'm 80 years old and looking like Jack Nicholson,I'll be able to tell myself proudly that I dated a very special person.
Ok.I guess that's enough crapping about my love life.I'm gonna stop while I'm ahead or else I'm gonna start writing mushy mushy stuff that would just melt my own heart like chocolate on a hot day.

Currently listening "Hearts Burst Into Fire" by Bullet for My Valentine.

Life is strange,c'est ne pas?

Have you guys ever wanted something but in the end got something which is better?Have you ever thought that sometimes the person that you might end up with would be the last person you would expect to end up with?(Am I making any sense there?)Have you ever thought Arsenal would go a whole season unbeaten and win the Premier League title?

Well,what I wanna ramble about is that all those things have happened to me.It's been kinda like a rush of cold blood to the head.(Now I'm quoting Coldplay's album title).What in the blue hell am I talking about?I'm not gonna tell but 1st August will forever go down in history as the day that I become the happiest comic book fanboy ever.OK.That seems too exaggerated.Lemme rephrase.The first of August would forever go down in history as the day I became the happiest guy on earth.That's another story which shall be told in due time.

Currently listening to "The Anthem" by Good Charlotte.